The Seven Deadly Sins of Sports: Envy, Gluttony, and Sloth

Part 2/2

Click here for a Link to Part 1: Pride, Greed, Lust, and Wrath

March 8, 2023

Read time: 10-15 minutes

I wrote on four of the deadly sins a little while ago.  I wanted to write on the other ones, but I got bored.  I started watching a Biggie Smalls documentary and got completely distracted.

The shortest phrase in the Bible is “Jesus wept.”  We’re gonna try to keep this one short and sweet as well.

To kick off the rest of the Seven Deadly Sins, we are going to start with Steve Ballmer, a very-very-very wealthy man.

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Envy = Steve Ballmer

I feel envy is not talked about nearly enough when we think about the Seven Deadly Sins.  It’s jealousy.  It’s wanting what others have.  Social media is partly driven by jealousy and emotion and we all know it.  It’s not wrong.  In fact, none of the sins are inherently wrong.  We just know that taking these seven deadly emotions and allowing them to fuel our actions without moderation or reflection can lead to human suffering.

When I think about envy in sports, I think about Steve Ballmer.  Steve is the owner of the Los Angeles Clippers.

Steve is a legend in the tech industry and a legend in the history of Microsoft.  His high energy and passion are well-known and it grabs your attention when seeing him on television.  Being a great businessman, over the years he accumulated enough wealth to become a philanthropist who can afford to donate hundreds of millions and probably billions of dollars.

Steve is just alright with me.

But Steve shows shades of envy towards his same-town rival, the Los Angeles Lakers.  Or at least, the internet says so.  He’s been quoted as saying the Clippers are not the Lakers’ “little brother.”  I understand.  It’s his team.  It’s his business.  He cares passionately about them being the best they can be.  To him, “little brother” is an insult.

In my opinion, calling the Clippers “little brother” to the Lakers is generous. 

As someone with a little brother, I recall us sharing a story not too long ago about our childhood.  I was not a nice older brother. 

The story goes like this…I kicked my little brother into a wall. 

To say the Lakers have been metaphorically kicking the Clippers into a wall for the entirety of the Clippers’ existence is, again, generous.

Would championships solve Steve’s “little brother” problem?  Maybe.

What about assembling all of the greatest talent in the history of mankind and one magical alien?  Would that stop the Clippers from being the Lakers’ “little brother?”  Perhaps.

I don’t fault Steve for having his perspective.  He’s a competitive businessman who wants to win. The only spot Steve seems to miss on is what the Lakers are, not just in basketball, but in all of sports.

The Lakers are like the Moon…things on Earth would just not move right without the Moon.  Things in sports would just not move right without the Lakers, or the Cowboys, or the Yankees.  As much as we hate them (holy smokes, Envy!), we need them.

Steve, my greatest hope for you in achieving the goal you desire is that the Moon falls out of the sky and crushes the Crypto.com Arena, leaving the Lakers with no place to play, and forcing them to fold.  I’m just hoping it happens in 2024, once your new arena is built. Until then, you need a roof over your head and the Lakers are giving you the roof.

I actually argue in this case, the Envy is positive.  It helps humans to look around, see what others doing, stretch their arms out to the stars, and tell themselves, “I think I can do better.”  And I think, within the context of Steve’s goals, Envy is just alright. 

Steve is building a new arena.  Most owners use tax money to build their new stadiums.  To my knowledge, Steve is not.  Thanks for showing you can do better, Steve. 

Gluttony = Lamar Odom

Lamar Odom love-love-loves candy.

There is very little to be said about Lamar’s rabid candy love, except for this:

Lamar’s personal assistant would regularly go to the grocery store and pick up pounds and pounds of candy.  Lamar has been quoted as saying, “I’m the supplier,” for the rest of his teammates.  He goes through “four or five bags a day,” on his own.

The primary source material for this information was from years and years ago when Lamar was on the Los Angeles Lakers.  I’ll say this, even if they’re fun-size bags of M&Ms that he ate four or five bags a day, that’s still a good amount of candy per day.  I’ll also say this, Lamar’s personal assistant was grabbing way-way-way more than four or five fun-size bags of itty-bitty M&Ms.

Like a lot of NBA players, Gluttony is tough to manage when you have millions and millions of dollars.  For goodness’ sake, Oliver Miller was an awesome NBA player for years, and teams constantly worried about his weight.  And Oliver was a good player in the NBA Finals against Michael Jordan.  When you succeed and are still gluttonous, that’s tough. 

The world said Lamar was great and winning championships while consuming 2,000 calories worth of gummy worms.  Hopefully, Lamar is mixing in a piece of broccoli or two nowadays.  Hey, anything is possible with the right attitude and support. 

Sloth = Brett Favre

On December 21, 2003, Brett Favre was thinking about not playing in his Monday Night Football game on December 22.  I know, it was quite out of character.  It was the night before the big football game and one of the NFL’s ultimate ironmen (297 consecutive starts) was thinking about not playing.  He was enveloped by the idea of Sloth…sort of.

Brett thought for a little bit.  He thought about it for maybe a second or two, maybe a minute or two.  Then, a voice shot into Brett’s head.  Brett said that the voice came into his head in the form of his father.  His father said, “What are you crazy?” 

Irvin Favre, Brett’s father, has been quoted saying that Brett “knows when to mean business and he knows when to play.”  With Irvin’s voice in Brett’s head, Brett knew what he had to do.

Irvin Favre died on December 21, 2003, the night before the big game.  Brett’s thoughts were spinning.  Brett refused to give in to Sloth.

Brett decided to play.  The ravenous Oakland Raiders home crowd cheered Brett Favre when he came onto the field.  That never happens in Oakland.  Oakland fans are similar to Philadelphia fans in terms of hatred…and those guys once booed Santa Claus.

Brett played his heart out.  He threw for 311 yards in the first half, alone.  And he led Green Bay to a 31-7 halftime lead.  Brett ended the game with 4 TDs, 399 yards, and Green Bay won 41-7.

And we all wept.

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Do you still believe in God?  Even through all the Deadly Sins? 

Sometimes, it’s not about the sinner or the sin.  Sometimes it’s about the circumstances surrounding us.  We are all sinners in some ways.  The Buddha said that and all that jazz. 

In Part 1 of this 2-Part series, it was as much about Tom Brady and his Pride, as it was about Adam Schefter and his Pride, and Gisele Bundchen and her Pride.  It was as much about Dennis Schroeder’s Greed as it was about his agency and their Greed.  And Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving I’m sure can tell that it’s not all about being Lustful about each one’s ability to get buckets.

If you don’t believe in God, that is a-okay with me.  None of this is about God…it’s about the people in our lives and how they struggle to see clearly through life’s challenges.  I wish them all, good luck.

Time for a Joke:

If not having confidence in yourself and low self-esteem were an Olympic sport,

I'd probably get a bronze medal.